Deep Thoughts...by Floyd Mayweather

JD's quotes:

''Pretty Boy'' Floyd Mayweather Jr., aka ''Money'' Mayweather, has done his best to set himself apart from all other boxers and certainly he has some interesting observations about why he might be so unique and about anyone who isn't thoroughly entertained by his skills.

Floyd on Larry Merchant [addressing the camera as Larry Merchant gives him an unimpressed post fight interview]:

''Larry Merchant is just a commentator, he don't know nothing about boxing.''

From the HBO documentary, Mayweather/Hatton 24/7:

Floyd on his mother's praise of him as a child:

''I think she knew that I was special because I think I was better than the rest of the kids.''

Also from HBO's Mayweather Hatton 24/7:

Floyd Mayweather Jr. on himself (I'll leave it out of context for laughs):

''I ain't got no hair...and I'm always green.''

Although at the time Floyd mentioned this last thought, he did appear to both be black and have some hair, I still believe him...why would anyone lie about that?

Mike Tyson...pure romance: The quotes that are better than Barry White music

JD'S quotes:

Okay, just for our commenter, Dig, I'm going to do some more Boxing stuff. First, let's do more Mike Tyson. Anyone who doesn't think Mike has a sweet side should see this. Please, keep in mind that this is from THREE SEPARATE INTERVIEWS...

Mike, charming a female journalist like the sweet talker that he is:

''I normally don't do interviews with womens unless I fornicate with them''

Mike explaining his supposed unique physical situation:

''I may like fornicating more than other people, it's just who I am.''

Mike on the riches of fame and fortune in his blessed life:

''I never dreamed of fornicating with many as beautiful women as I did.''

If this isn't enough to convince you that Mike is just like a bulky Don Juan, he also is a singer with the voice of an angel...here he is on ''Jimmy Kimmel Live'' doing a duet with Bobby Brown which might bring a tear to your eye...although it might be a tear of excruciating pain more than anything else:

Mike Tyson's dating method? (Larry Merchant quotes, for the boxing romantic)

JD's quotes:

Once upon a time...the greatest boxing commentator in all the land said something that could easily be misconstrued... Larry Merchant speaking of then heavyweight champ, Mike Tyson as Tyson made his way to the ring in his prime, stated:

''Mike has termed this phase of a fight, his favorite phase. He calls it ''like going out on a date'', it's finally gonna happen...Of course, his idea of a date... is Wham Bam, thank you, sir.''

...Larry, be honest...Were you trying to pick a fight, here? Also, here's a treat for Larry's fans who want to see him be more ''hands on'' with the audience:

Regis knows things: The best out-of-context quote I've ever seen

JD's quotes:

Yeah, old Uncle Regis, he's been around the block a few times.
King of Television aka Regis Philbin aka ''Big Daddy'' on ''Live with Regis and Kelly'' remarks:


''I can tell you... because I've been with Madonna-few times now; not-not a uh, transvestite.''

Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking 'What?'. . .and you're right where I want you to be when you're thinking that. All I'll say is that it's an accurate quote. I'm leaving it out of context though because it's too perfect not too. Sorry!



Here's a great clip of Regis doing Jimmy Kimmel for a Don Rickles special episode:

Just one of the things that can ruin a marriage (Medical advice from Leon Phelps)

JD's quotes:

One of my favorite SNL characters was Leon Phelps-The Ladies' Man. He doles out advice during a call-in show with a lisp, some Courvoisier cognac and a 1970s fashion sense. One of the funniest things about Leon is that even though he is clearly a womanizer as well as an idiot, he genuinely is trying to help people. He's really trying to be a good guy and solve problems. . . He's a little bit like a black, swinger version of Dr. Phil.

SNL survivor, Tim Meadows as The Ladies' Man Leon Phelps helping a distraught male caller:


''Yeah, your wang is scared. I suggest that you get over it soon before your wife hooks up with someone with a more courageous wang.''

. . . Thanks, Leon. We'll all fight the dreaded wang fear that has been destroying marriages for hundreds of years! Sorry to be so dramatic but wang fear is a very serious and dramatic subject. I promise to keep it lighter in the next post. I hate dragging people down.